If you’re struggling with your mental health, you know how it can affect every aspect of your life, including your relationships. Mental blocks can make it difficult to connect deeply with others, both initially and long-term.
Fortunately, therapy can hold the key to resolving these issues. And according to a study by the dating app Hinge, therapy can even make you more attractive! Read on to learn how prioritizing your mental health can also improve your relationships.
1. You Can Improve Your Communication Skills
One of the fundamental pillars of good relationship building is communication. Many relationships begin in what’s called a honeymoon phase, where it feels like everything just clicks. But disagreements and confrontations are a natural part of life that will emerge eventually. People who go to therapy tend to be better at discussing sensitive topics constructively than those who don’t. They can translate that skill to their intimate relationships when things do get difficult.
Keep in mind that, in some instances, therapy can only do so much. Talk therapy may need to be supplemented with prescription mental health treatment to help balance chemicals in the brain. These treatments can make your therapy more effective and its results longer-lasting. Improving your mental health can allow you to develop communication skills to better your relationships.
2. You Can Break the Chains of the Past
Trauma is something that people who have experienced it will carry with them wherever they go. If you’ve endured a distressing life experience, you have likely developed this emotional response. Being cheated on, being manipulated by a partner, and having absent or abusive parents are all forms of trauma. If you haven’t identified and begun to work on your trauma, there’s a chance it bleeds into your relationships. Your partner might do something innocently that triggers your trauma, causing you to respond to the situation disproportionately.
Going to therapy is one way that you can begin untangling the trauma’s grasp on your life. And that’s something potential partners are actively looking for. In its 2022 study, Hinge reported that 91% of singles on its site would prefer to date someone who goes to therapy. And 89% said they’d go on a second date with someone who mentioned on a first date that they go to therapy. Though only 8% of users feel comfortable revealing on a first date that they go to therapy, others clearly should. The demand for romantic partners who work on their mental health is, quite literally, out there.
3. You Can Cultivate a Growth Mindset
Addressing the lingering pains of your past is an important step toward increasing your desirability as a partner. You’ll be able to navigate your negative emotions more effectively as they relate to your previous trauma. But going to therapy isn’t only about dealing with what’s happened to you in the past. It’s also about creating a foundation of resilience within so you can face the future with confidence. That’s important because relationships aren’t static — they’re living, breathing entities that also change over time.
In “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success,” Carol Dweck explores how people with a “fixed mindset” expect their partner to be nearly perfect. So when they inevitably experience challenges in their relationship, they see it as a failure. Alternatively, those with a “growth mindset” face such challenges with curiosity and openness. Going to therapy is one way you can begin to shine a light on your mindset and cultivate growth in yourself.
4. You Can Rekindle Your Love of Fun
Have you ever noticed how easily kids tend to make friends with each other? In part that’s because kids are more open than adults, but it’s also because, for them, play is second nature.
Now think about a date you felt was successful, or if you’ve never been on one, imagine what it would be like. A date can be good for many reasons, but chances are, fun is a big one of those reasons. Joking, laughing, exploring, and playing games are all ways of having fun. Even sex, multifaceted thing that it is, is an adult form of play.
Playfulness and fun are criminally undervalued parts of life that can act as fundamental parts of building a relationship. However, many adults have lost their mojo when it comes to play, and understandably so. Life can be hard, and there often isn’t time or energy to just play. The struggle can be so very real that fun gets pushed to the wayside, making room for depression to set in. That’s why building fun into your life, cultivating it, and even planning it can be such a therapeutic process.
Confidence Is Attractive
It might seem a bit far-fetched at first, but going to therapy really can make you appear more attractive to others. People who put in the work and strive to cultivate their well-being often have an appropriate air of confidence about themselves. And many potential partners see that confidence as incredibly attractive, regardless of age, gender, or race.
Such assurance can even come across in your message writing as you swipe your way through Tinder. No one said it would be easy, but going to therapy is one way you can boost your confidence and make yourself more attractive.
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